Laura (00:31)
Sure. So I’m a marketing and systems strategist. I own an agency and my team and I help other entrepreneurs with their marketing and their systems and just growing their business in general. I started this business in 2019. It wasn’t always easy. Let’s put it that way. But at the time I was married and I had a very nice, you know, steady income until I didn’t.

And thankfully, I had built up the business the way I did to be able to get divorced ⁓ because a lot of people, and I think this is a great conversation that we could have at some point. I don’t know if that’s what you want to start with, but I mean, like just to have a steady business ⁓ during such a hard time in my life. So in the last year, I have gotten

Well, it’s not even official yet. The divorce is not finalized. I’m still in the process. ⁓ but I did have to move my child, my two year old and I back home to Florida from Virginia. We were living in Virginia because I just really, I couldn’t stay there. ⁓ it was, ⁓ it wasn’t like, it wasn’t a horrible situation or anything like that, but it was just, I couldn’t be by myself. So that was my only thing.

Brandi Lewis (01:54)
Yeah.

Laura (01:56)
and I really needed the support of my family and while sometimes I look like I actually did have a breakdown this week a little bit about how I feel like that makes me weak ⁓ because I need family and I need the support and help help raising my child I also need to think about how blessed I am to able to have that but yeah I did move and the entire month of December when I moved almost a year ago like 10 months ago I

Barely worked because I was just so like it was hard it was a hard time But my business did not skip a beat and so I was like able to thank God I had these systems in place to be able to continue To have an income and it was just it’s just a blessing the way I built this up So now I teach other women business owners who are wanting that sort of Like structure in their business like you should not be working

Brandi Lewis (02:52)
Thank you.

Laura (02:55)
Like you should not be an employee of your own business is what I’m trying to say and so yeah some so many people I used to have it that way until I built it in this way where I don’t have it and as that anymore and it’s just so much easier and It gives you a more flexibility for when life throws you plot twists because it will

Brandi Lewis (03:13)
that’s so beautiful. I love that. There’s so much we can unpack within that too. Just being like a woman and having grace and learning to just see your blessings, even though you’re going through so much. There’s so much to unpack in that, which we’ll definitely get to. I definitely want to start out with, if you don’t mind just telling us a little bit about your backstory of how you got to the point of where you are, where you moved to Florida. ⁓

you how long were you married? How was that marriage and what happened for your move?

Laura (03:45)
So, he was my high school sweetheart. So we were together for 18 years. It was a long time. And we married for, we were married for eight. I actually moved the day, like the day over eight year anniversary, wedding anniversary. ironic how that happened. I don’t know. And so back in May of 2024, I got an inquiry on my website of all things.

Brandi Lewis (03:49)
Aww.

Wow.

Yeah.

Laura (04:16)
from a man saying that his wife and my husband were having an affair. The way like my stomach was on the floor when I saw that, was like thinking about that, that was pretty traumatic because it was like, that’s my business. Like it feels a little bit like invasive, but also like, holy moly, what is happening right now? And so from that, I was like, I can’t, I can’t do this. Like, I can’t, what do I do? Like I can’t.

And at that point we had a one and a half year old. He wasn’t even one and half. He was a little less, a little younger. ⁓ and it was like, do I want to uproot his life? At the time he was out of town. He wasn’t even in town when I got that message. call, I, I screenshotted what I got. I sent it to him he called me immediately.

Brandi Lewis (04:55)
Mm-hmm.

Laura (05:03)
He was he was crying, he was like, my god. And he was out of town, he was on a business trip, he traveled a lot for work. He came back that night, like even though he wasn’t done with his trip. And he was like begging me to stay. I was literally packing a bag when he got home. I was like, I can’t, I was torn. I was like, do I uproot my child? Like what do I do? Yeah, and my child, he, yeah, he was one.

Brandi Lewis (05:24)
Yeah, because it’s not just you. Yeah.

Laura (05:29)
But he had his life there. He had a daycare that he went to. Had his friends, which I know he’s just one, but it’s it’s truthfully like he what sold me is the fact that we didn’t have anybody there. Like we didn’t have family. was just us. he had it. But he had his life. He had his daycare. You know, it was the whole thing. And to take him away from his father, because I would have to go back all the way to Florida. It’s still something that I struggle with a lot. Like I even had a conversation with him this morning. My ex.

Brandi Lewis (05:32)
Thank you.

Laura (05:59)
Because he’s a government employee and right now the government is shut down and so he can’t he’s not getting paid So he’s he’s very good about his child support duties and all the things and he was telling me that he obviously can’t give me You know anything this time because he didn’t get paid So I obviously I understood it and it’s like he also I did not know this they took away his leave because he’s not I Think he’s actually working for no pay right now because he’s part of the essentials. But anyway

Brandi Lewis (06:04)
Yeah.

Laura (06:27)
⁓ So it’s one of those things they took away his leave so he can’t even come see his son and it’s just that Breaks my heart for my son. So anyway, I was me. I decided to give him a chance chance And that would have been chance number. I don’t even know how many to be honest with you ⁓ At the end of the day He still swears up and down that it wasn’t like a physical affair that it was just emotional. She was a co-worker

Brandi Lewis (06:32)
⁓

Mm-hmm.

Laura (06:56)
I just felt uncomfortable about the whole thing. So I gave him like, you know, three things that I really wanted from him, open phone policy, ⁓ location, and we need to go to therapy together and fix our finances. Like that was like all in one. I think if we fix that, be good. That’s I thinking. So we started couples therapy. We had a great couples therapist. She was great. ⁓ but you know, it just,

Brandi Lewis (07:12)
Mm-hmm.

Laura (07:20)
It always stuck in the back of my mind, like I’m never gonna be able to trust him ever again. And like how am I ever gonna know whether like was it really not physical? Like ⁓ truthfully, what’s the real truth? truthfully, emotional, an emotional affair is almost worse. It’s almost worse. Betrayal of any kind is not great. It’s not a great feeling, but…

Brandi Lewis (07:29)
Yeah, what’s the real truth?

Yeah.

Laura (07:46)
an emotional, it’s like you had an emotional connection to someone who was not your wife. Like that’s not okay. And so it just didn’t work. Like we kept fighting. It wasn’t great. It wasn’t a great feeling. My mom visited for her birthday actually in November. And at that point we were kind of sleeping in separate rooms,

Brandi Lewis (07:49)
Thank you.

Laura (08:05)
and he just decided to leave and go be with her. He left and went to be with her anyway. Yeah. huh. He went to be with her.

Brandi Lewis (08:08)
Yeah.

No. So how

long within this did he decide to leave and just go be with her?

Laura (08:22)
Truthfully, I don’t think he ever stopped talking to her. I asked, but I don’t, I’m never gonna know the truth. He did say, he did admit to me that he like started talking to her again, like in August. That’s when things got pretty weird. Like he wasn’t this as affectionate, I guess. And I was like, you know, I’ve always been someone who doesn’t micromanage my partner. don’t like, I like.

Brandi Lewis (08:25)
Really?

Yeah. Yeah.

Thank you.

Laura (08:49)
I live the feeling of being detached and I don’t mean detached in like a cold way. mean like unbothered, like, okay, if you’re going to cheat, you’re going to cheat. That is what it is. And there’s nothing I can do about it. Looking through your phone is not going to solve the problem. Like I’ve always been like that. So, and that took a long time to get to, by the way, lots of evolution as a person. But I also felt like, ⁓ you know, because, because I did have this experience with him.

Brandi Lewis (08:59)
Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah.

Laura (09:19)
quite a few times ⁓ where it was like he would talk to other girls that we knew like in high school and I’d be like, it was like, I’m like, how dare you? And I would look through his phone like, and then I got to a point where I was like, you know what? This is like unhealthy. Like, why am I literally like not it’s like self-sabotage. It’s like, why do I want to look if he’s going to cheat, he’s going to cheat. Like it is what it is. And if, know, so I was in this mentality where I’m okay. I’m like, I’m okay.

Brandi Lewis (09:24)
Okay.

Yeah.

Laura (09:45)
with my life the way it is regardless of whether he’s in it or not. So at the point where he decided to leave, I had like a day where I was like, my God, I can’t get out of bed and I’m crying and like my life is changing. The only reason I was that upset, obviously he was my life partner. He was my very best friend. He was my high school sweetheart. Yeah, we grew up together. I spent most like I was with him for most of my life. It was a hard thing to let go of.

Brandi Lewis (09:47)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah, you’re up together, yeah.

Yeah.

Laura (10:13)
in that sense, but I feel like also it had died like way back in May, like anyway, and so I was kind of over it at that point, but I was also promised some things like retirement and like I took out a lot of my retirement and throughout our marriage, like I was a teacher before I started my business and I ⁓ pulled out my entire retirement when I quit teaching just to keep us afloat so I could start my business and

Brandi Lewis (10:18)
Yeah.

Laura (10:41)
Well, yes, it was me, my business, and I understand that, we’re a partnership and he was totally supportive. He was going to help me financially no matter what. But it was like one of those things he’s like, I got you. Don’t worry. My retirement is going to cover us both when it comes down. Like it was one of those things. And so that was taken from me when this was like, like finalized. And it’s like, now we’re negotiating that aspect because I am technically entitled to half of his retirement.

Brandi Lewis (10:55)
Yeah, like for the future. Yeah, not within the moment.

Yeah.

Laura (11:10)
for half of the amount of time we were married. So that’s like the technicality. anyway, so it was just one of those things where I was scared. was like, my business is doing really, really well, but it’s like, I’m gonna have to support me and my child now, like alone.

Brandi Lewis (11:28)
when he said he was going to leave? Was that a turning moment for you of trying to figure out, how am going to do my life? And also, when did you tell your mom? Because you want to protect your parents. I’m very close to my parents. I don’t know about you, but you want to protect them and tell them when they actually need to know instead of before. How was both of those?

Laura (11:53)
Okay, well

you know what’s actually funny is that on her birthday, that’s when this happened. He decided to leave on her So she was there.

Brandi Lewis (11:59)
No way.

⁓ my gosh. So your mom was there in the act seeing it all happen.

Laura (12:05)
He was dead.

She was there in the act and, ⁓ yes, I am a fiery redhead.

Brandi Lewis (12:15)
Yeah.

Laura (12:17)
And so she did see some things that, my god, you know, like…

Brandi Lewis (12:21)
But you don’t know how you’re gonna react in that moment.

Laura (12:23)
But truthfully, I tell my friends what happened and like what I did and they’re like, you didn’t burn his clothes? Like, what are you talking about? You didn’t burn the house down? So I did throw a shoe at his head and I threw his clothes down the stairs. That’s what I did. That was it. I mean, like some people, they… His sister actually was going through something very similar and she cut up all of her husband’s clothes with scissors. So…

Brandi Lewis (12:29)
Yeah, no one knows how they’re going to react. Yeah.

That’s not bad. It’s really not bad.

yeah, yeah.

Laura (12:53)
At least I didn’t do that. So,

Brandi Lewis (12:53)
She took time. Exactly.

Laura (12:58)
you know, I did that. so like, yeah, I had one day of anger the next day I was in bed. My mom had to leave shortly after that. I can’t remember the exact timeline right now. She had to leave to come back. She works and so she had to come back to work. It was Thanksgiving shortly after. I had already planned a trip home to Miami for the holidays. So I had a plane ticket.

Brandi Lewis (13:20)
Yeah.

Laura (13:23)
and as of right then i was thinking okay well i guess i’m just gonna have to wait until the plane like until we come for the holidays and we’re just not gonna come back i was still mulling over am i gonna like move or am i gonna stay here i don’t know virginia is also very expensive where we were it’s but in the dc area very expensive also miami is also expensive what am i saying but

Brandi Lewis (13:39)
Thank you.

Yeah.

Laura (13:48)
I would have had the support of my family

and eventually I did move in to my grandma’s house with my mom and my grandma. And I am not ashamed of it. At first I am. I was a little bit, but I am not ashamed of it anymore because I truly need, I needed help, especially when I first got here. Like, I needed the emotional support for myself, but I still need the physical help with my child. And thank God.

Brandi Lewis (14:15)
Yeah, absolutely.

Laura (14:18)
I live here because in March I fell and I broke four fingers on this hand and it’s still not great. I can’t bend this finger. It’s one of those things. so I need help. need like actual physical help taking care of my kid. Like I can’t do a lot of things that I used to. So yeah, that’s a different story. But ⁓ yeah, from my mom was there and this happened in November,

Brandi Lewis (14:28)
⁓ no!

Thank

Yeah.

Laura (14:44)
For a few weeks it was like, I moving? Am I not moving? Am I uprooting my child from his life? He only really had daycare, his friends, but I just like, I wanted his father in his life for my child’s sake. As much as I hated him in that moment, it was like, I still want him to be my child’s father. Like he has to be in his life. And it’s like, if we moved to Florida, how is that gonna work? And it’s like, it’s not two seconds away and he doesn’t even fly, which is so annoying. So he wouldn’t like take an airplane to come visit him. He has to drive the whole 15 hours.

Brandi Lewis (14:54)
Yeah, of course.

wow.

Laura (15:14)
It’s a whole thing. And so it was really hard, but I ultimately decided that that would be the best move. And truthfully, I do not regret it because now my son gets to grow up with family. I have three nieces and a nephew that live here. My brothers are not in my life, but that’s besides the point. My brother’s ex-wife is basically an aunt to him. ⁓ And I have cousins. My cousin has four kids.

Brandi Lewis (15:37)
Aww. ⁓

Laura (15:42)
One of my other cousins has a kid and so it’s like, you know, he has a ton of family here and I honestly have never been happier, which is crazy considering like I really thought I had the perfect life. And when I look back on it, my God, I could have been so much more free and so, so different. yeah, like it was traumatic, but it’s made me who I am.

Brandi Lewis (15:47)
Yeah.

Yeah.

Laura (16:12)
today and I feel like I cannot, I couldn’t be more thankful. Like I think this has taught me that everything that happens to you happens for a reason, which is such a cliche thing, but it’s so true. Like everything happens for a reason and it’s supposed to be where you’re like, you’re supposed to be where you’re supposed to be, like where you’re meant to be. And so I’m like, I’ve met the most amazing people since I moved back home. have my friends now too that I’ve missed because I’ve been away and so it’s been so great.

Brandi Lewis (16:25)
It is.

Yeah.

Aww.

That’s so awesome. I love hearing that because it seems like, you know, from what I gather is from the beginning of you moving to Florida, there could have been some shame there and embarrassment of moving in with family and you’re supposed to be in a family, you know, have your own family. You don’t have that anymore to moving out of that and really seeing the blessings that really came from all of that. Where would you say was that turning point from you feeling that embarrassment of shame to you saying,

that none of that matters. Like, when did that change happen?

Laura (17:15)
So I still struggle with it sometimes where I’m like, feel a little embarrassed. So I’m not gonna lie. I have been in the dating pool a little bit since I’ve, you know, honestly, I don’t no regrets, right? Like, I’m doing what like I’m having so much fun. And so it’s kind of like a weird conversation, of course, when it’s like, yeah, I live with family. But what I’ve learned also is that’s Miami in Miami, specifically lots of Hispanics. I’m Cuban. So it’s very

Brandi Lewis (17:17)
Thank

Good for you. ⁓

Yeah.

Yeah. ⁓

Laura (17:44)
traditional. Yeah, I’m Cuban and so like tons of people in Miami, it’s a very like familial place. So like my mom also grew up with both grandparents, like she lived with one set of grandparents on the other set of grandparents. My even my my ex in-laws, they lived with their parents to sometimes like they went from one set of parents. They lived like it’s so common. ⁓

Brandi Lewis (17:44)
I can hear the accent I was gonna ask. was like, she’s gotta be, some Spanish or something in there.

Thank you.

Yeah.

Laura (18:14)
and it’s not necessarily it shouldn’t be and truthfully the way I feel better about myself is that I’m doing what’s best for my child and what’s best for my child is having a mother who’s functional because she has help and I know that so many moms out there might be listening to this like you’re so lucky I don’t have that sort of so I recognize that I’m very lucky that I have a village it takes a village I have a village

Brandi Lewis (18:25)
you

Yeah.

Thank you.

Laura (18:44)
Not everyone has that. And so that’s kind of what I’ve told myself to make myself less quote unquote embarrassed about the situation. At the end of the day, I know I can move out if I want to. Like financially, I’m good. ⁓ But I just love being close to family and I just need that support. And I don’t think that there’s any shame in the support and needing that support. In fact, I think it’s actually commendable to

Brandi Lewis (18:59)
Yeah.

Laura (19:13)
recognize that I need the help and do what’s best for my child. So that’s kind of what I-

Brandi Lewis (19:16)
Yeah, I think

it’s beautiful. I think that’s awesome. I I think so many of us have probably and have been through so much in our lives that we never expected. Like for me, my whole thing is health. Like I was diagnosed with two rare blood disorders at the age of 19. I was like a sophomore in college, ready to start the sophomore year. And that happened and it’s been a huge kind of, I call it a blessing in disguise because

I was able to see how strong I was, all of that. So hearing your story, I can see the blessings, even though it was a hard time, I see all the blessings that are there and the things that are happening to really help you also. And I think that’s awesome. I think it takes a lot of courage to up and move from one state to another as well, and try and navigate the divorce, all of that. What would you say to somebody out there that

is probably in the same shoes as you as far as getting divorced, like a woman that maybe doesn’t have the confidence or the boost. What advice would you give somebody starting out that’s going through a divorce just like you?

Laura (20:26)
The first thing I would say is really sit with your feelings because suppressing them doesn’t do anything. That’s coming from someone who hates emotions and hates feelings and other trauma in my life has caused me to really hate expressing myself too, but that’s besides the point. But it’s sometimes super necessary. So feel the feelings, but then it’s kind of like…

Brandi Lewis (20:32)
you

you

Laura (20:55)
That one day where I was in, I couldn’t get out of bed. I was still in Virginia and I called my mom and I was crying and I was like, I couldn’t like get out of bed and whatever. My aunt happened to be here, my mom’s sister, and she grabbed the phone from my mom and said, put on your big girl panties and get out of bed. I went through the same thing. Your mom went through, like so many people have gone through the same thing. ⁓ my aunt actually like very similar story. ⁓ she had to just get up and move away as well. And

Brandi Lewis (21:13)
Aww.

Laura (21:26)
she it happened at a time in her life when her father passed away too ⁓ and it was like so many things she’s like i went through hell like she was telling me this on the phone to scream at me put on your big girl panties you gotta do what you gotta do for your kingdom yeah it’s like it is sometimes we just need that tough love ⁓ but you do you should take that time for yourself to let yourself feel the feelings i think it’s important but and i know

Brandi Lewis (21:36)
Yeah. That tough love. Yeah.

Laura (21:55)
I depression is like a real thing. It’s like a really hard struggle that people have and people, there are people that cannot get out of bed when they go through things like this. And it’s like a real thing. ⁓ But at the end of the day, what helped me move forward was the thought of my kid and like what is staying in bed going to do for my child? Like I am like.

Brandi Lewis (21:58)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Laura (22:19)
I’m going to lose clients. I’m going to lose clients. I’m going to not be able to make money in my business and I really need my business to sustain me now. It’s not even an option anymore. And so I really needed to get out of bed. so trust me, I know because my other aunt, my dad’s sister, when she went through something very similar, I can’t believe we all go through this. It’s horrible. ⁓ She went through something very similar and there were days she couldn’t get out of bed and she didn’t go to work. And then she would get in trouble at work.

Brandi Lewis (22:41)
Yeah.

Yeah.

Laura (22:49)
And so in that sense, I’m very blessed because I, you know, I’m a business owner and it’s, kind of like make my own hours, but I still have clients that I need to make sure get what they need. And so I didn’t want to lose my clients in the process of this. So like I snapped out of it basically is what it is. So if anyone is going through this right now, just feel the feelings, take your time, but then

Keep that one thing in mind that’s going to keep you going if you’re a single mom. If you’re mom, then it’s your child, or your children. If you’re not a mom and you’re still going through something like this, find that one thing in your life that’s going to keep you going and that’s gonna give you that reason to get out of bed because that’s literally what saved me.

Brandi Lewis (23:20)
Yeah.

Yeah, that’s really good advice, especially feel your feelings. I think that’s always important and something we don’t like to do as humans, especially when they’re horrible feelings like that’s the last thing we want to do. But I feel like getting those feelings out really kind of helps so you can move forward. I do want to talk about your business as well, because it sounds like, which I think is great for women to hear is you having something of your own that has sustained you and helped you.

So that’s one of the less worries is finances and what are you gonna do on that part because you had your own. tell us about the processes and all of that that you set up yourself.

Laura (24:19)
So my business is almost completely automated to the point where I mean, I am client facing. I’m the strategy behind a lot of things, but I have a lot of automations and processes in place so that I can spend more time one-on-one with clients versus in my business, right? You wanna spend more time, wait, you wanna spend more time.

Brandi Lewis (24:40)
Mm-hmm.

Laura (24:45)
on your business, not in your business. I don’t know, I don’t remember the saying right now. you, there’s like this saying that people say. And so ⁓ having these systems and it looks different from person to person. It could be hiring a team when you’re ready, of course. I wouldn’t recommend hiring people before you’re ready, like financially. And that’s part of what I do because I do have an agency. And so I’ve learned to delegate. I’ve learned to structure my business in a way where

the money flows in and get funneled to my team, but it’s still making a profit, you know, that sort of thing. And it’s like, something that takes a lot of brain power. ⁓ But at the end of the day, ⁓ a lot of the women I work with now in the coaching side of things, it’s more, ⁓ you know, coaches and healers, things like that, that I’m teaching them how to automate their business so they don’t have to constantly be worrying about that.

Brandi Lewis (25:15)
Yeah.

Laura (25:42)
Now, if you’re in this position like I was in and you haven’t started a business, because I know that what’s so common nowadays is that women feel stuck in marriages because they cannot financially leave. so I’m so blessed that I was able to like that I left that the things ended at a point when, you know, I had this study income coming in and it was like my business didn’t

Brandi Lewis (25:57)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.

you

Laura (26:12)
take a like skip a beat truthfully but ⁓ I know some women don’t have that option like even stay at home moms ⁓ and I know that some people like mom moms especially like we do anything for our kids and you want you want to stay home and you want to be a stay at home mom I encourage you if you have a passion if you have any sort of ⁓ you know skill everyone has a skill so

Brandi Lewis (26:27)
Thank

Laura (26:42)
Anyone, every single person in this universe has a skill of some sort. monetize your skill. Figure out what that is. Figure out what sort of business you can start. Even stay at home moms, you take nap time. build, I have helped women build businesses during nap time. I have. Because it’s one of those things that is so important to have your own.

financials so you’re not relying on somebody else in case things go south. I have made it almost my life mission to help women in that exact position where they feel stuck in marriages and they can’t get out ⁓ because they just can’t afford it. It’s kind of like, yeah, so I help them figure out what that skill is, start the business. While it takes a while for a business to take off, at least you’re making forward momentum.

Brandi Lewis (27:19)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Laura (27:37)
And

honestly, in today’s economy, it’s almost like, it worth sending a kid to daycare or going to work because you’re paying your entire paycheck is going to go to daycare. Literally, like daycare is so expensive. It’s crazy. And so ⁓ it’s one of those things your business can make you an infinite amount of money. Like when you truly believe that it can. In fact, money is like.

Brandi Lewis (27:50)
It is.

Laura (28:02)
renewable resource like there’s infinite amounts of money in this world you can make as much money as you want you just have to really put your mind to it and work and and structure your business in a way that brings in that money so

Brandi Lewis (28:17)
I think that is amazing. And I think a lot of women need to know that. think a lot of time in marriages, you are so dependent on the male and, you know, some, of course there are a lot of women that handle the finances, but I think you’re so dependent on the male that you lose sight of you bringing in money and you keeping yourself afloat just in case anything happens like what has happened with you. But I think you’ve also,

have such a great story of telling women what to do if you’re in that boat and really helping women find that skill. If you don’t mind like sharing, where do you tell somebody that’s like, okay, I’m listening to this, I’m a woman and I want to find my skill. Where do they start? Like how do they start to hone in and find that one skill that may help them make money?

Laura (29:11)
So like I said, everyone has a skill. Just really look deep down. What in your life have you been good at? What in your life have you helped other people with? Have people come to you for relationship? I have helped somebody become a relationship coach, legit, because she’s helped people with relationships. Yeah. And it was not something that she was like ever, she ever fathomed she would do. It was like, what? I’m a relationship coach. That’s so random.

Brandi Lewis (29:13)
Mm-hmm.

I love that.

Laura (29:37)
Have you given people like, even back in high school, did you give people advice on boys and things like that? You would probably have a brain for that sort of thing to help people in their relationships. And some people, and people will invest in what they want. So people will invest in a relationship coach if they really need it. If we really wanted to make this work, I would have invested in a relationship coach back then, but that wasn’t really the case.

Brandi Lewis (29:54)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Laura (30:03)
And so, you know, ⁓ just figure out what that is, what in your life, what do your friends tell you you’re good at? Even ask people around you, ask your parents, ask your siblings, ⁓ what are you good at? What do you like to do? So actually I started my, like it’s still part of my business. It’s like a secondary business, I guess.

⁓ and that is makeup. I’m a freelance makeup artist as well, ⁓ certified freelance makeup artist. I do lots of bridal, but I also do special effects, so Halloween’s my favorite. I love this time of year. ⁓ And so I ⁓ started an Instagram account and a YouTube channel way back in 2014, ⁓ marketing my, like not marketing, I was just like, it was fun. It was for funsies. And then I started making money off of like the actual platforms back when they actually paid really well, now they don’t pay as well, but that’s the point.

Brandi Lewis (30:46)
Yeah.

Yeah.

Laura (30:54)
And then I started getting tons of bookings for clients for makeup because of it. And I was like, wait a minute, I could teach other people how to use social media as marketing. So that’s how I started my agency. So you have to like figure out what it is. Like it’s, it turned my stuff turned into this. Like my passion was makeup, makeup, like it paid really, it paid okay. Like to be on the platforms and posts, like I got, you know, money off of the platforms, but ultimately what got me money was

Brandi Lewis (31:08)
Hmm.

Laura (31:23)
booking clients and things like that. It was a secondary job. It was like I was still teaching at the time. So it wasn’t like I was relying on it and putting a ton of effort in either, but it still worked really well. And so what I’m saying is maybe you’re good at makeup, maybe like whatever that skill you might have is, it could turn, it could evolve into something else, into a completely different business model. I never thought I would have an agency and then also like a coaching side of my business. And still, I still do makeup stuff on the side and I still do.

Brandi Lewis (31:25)
you

Laura (31:53)
sometimes brands will ask me to promote their products and pay me for it. So like it’s kind of like it’s like a different sort of side to my business. And so yeah, that’s pretty much what I would say. Like ask your friends, ask your parents, ask people around you what like they think you’re good at or really look inside. Did people ask you in high school for help like on certain things like just figure out what that would be and

Brandi Lewis (31:57)
yeah!

Mm-hmm.

Laura (32:20)
just realize that there’s a market for everything in this world. And especially in the online space, you can make a business out of anything. I am now helping recently, one of my most recent new clients is a suicide loss coach. so she, like that’s such a niche, it’s a very niche thing. So she took her like the pain of losing her brother to suicide and now she’s helping other people who have gone through very similar things. Grief.

Brandi Lewis (32:37)
wow, it is.

Laura (32:49)
through suicide. Like it’s, it’s so interesting how anything in your life can turn into a business. So not only like, what are you good at and like what people might’ve asked you for help with in the past, but what have you gone through yourself? Because that’s literally what this client has made her business around, which is very true.

Brandi Lewis (32:57)
Yeah.

That is such good advice. I love that. That also makes me think like any older women that may think it’s too late. What do you tell them? I love to speak to older women that are like, ⁓ would love to do that, but I can’t do that now. And I think that it’s good for them to hear that they could still do it. So what do you say about that?

Laura (33:09)
I’m gonna

Mm-mm.

It’s never too late. In fact, this client that I just told you about is in her 50s and she’s just starting her business. ⁓ and she still works full time, which is great. ⁓ you know, like most of my, not most of my clients, but most business owners, obviously they start this as like a side hustle type thing until they can sustain themselves. And that’s totally fine. It is never too late. You are never

Brandi Lewis (33:33)
Wow.

Yeah.

Laura (33:53)
My mother-in-law is 60 something, I forget, my ex-mother-in-law, ⁓ and she wants to start a sewing business. She’s been wanting to do it for years. The thing is that what happens with older women is that exact mentality. I’m too old, it’s too late, and then they never do it. And that just makes me so sad. And when I watched my ex-mother-in-law, like what happened with her, she was working in a field that she…

Brandi Lewis (34:06)
Mm-hmm. ⁓

Laura (34:17)
Literally had zero desire to work in and now that she’s retired she wants to do something with her life and she feels like it’s still too late and it is not It is not too late. You can start at whatever time you want. Like there’s always a market for for everything honestly

Brandi Lewis (34:19)
Yeah.

and

Yeah, ⁓ I love hearing that because I think women don’t hear that a lot or you may be too scared to start your own business. I think that’s really good advice for people to know.

So going back to your divorce and talking about how that change was, you talked a lot about your village as well. How important was it for you to have that village behind you when you were going through your divorce?

Laura (34:58)
Truthfully, ⁓ it was more like I needed the emotional support. My mom is my absolute best friend. I’m so blessed to have, like my mom is my absolute best friend, but I know some people have tricky relationships with their mothers. Obviously it’s depending on the situation. And like I said before, not everyone has a village and I recognize I’m so blessed that I do.

Brandi Lewis (35:06)
Yeah, I’m the same. Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Laura (35:21)
What’s ironic about my divorce, by the way, is that my ex-mother-in-law went through the exact same thing and my ex-husband ⁓ was there to witness it. He was there to witness her sort of breakdowns and it was really hard for him.

Brandi Lewis (35:35)
Ugh.

Laura (35:38)
he’s seen that side twice because back together. His parents got back together when we were in high school and then And then they separated again.

she would tell me the stories of, you know, their first of their they weren’t married the second time, but their divorce. They’re like when my ex was five ⁓ and she didn’t have a village. She did not have a village. They lived in New York.

Brandi Lewis (36:03)
Hmm.

Laura (36:05)
And her entire family was in Puerto Rico or in Gainesville, so randomly, Gainesville, Florida. It’s like a little town. And so that’s where her family lived. She did not have a village. And so she created her own village. She had friends that she’s still friends with from today, even though she moved back to Miami. She moved to Miami ⁓ years later and she’s still in contact with them and they live in New York. ⁓

Brandi Lewis (36:11)
Yeah.

Hmm.

Wow.

Laura (36:31)
So it’s one of those things, she made her own village. You can always make your own village. ⁓ It’s so hard to make friends as an adult. Like I’m still myself trying to make friends. I have some of my friends from high school that even though when I moved away, like we kind of lost contact and we still talk now and we hang out and I like, I have my friends that I’ve missed, but I wanna make new friends and it’s been a little tricky. ⁓

Brandi Lewis (36:40)
It is.

Laura (36:56)
It’s kind of hard to do that, but I have found that the internet, the online space is a very easy way to do that. Enjoying a bunch of Facebook groups for your town. Like I am in part of this Facebook group, Girlfriendships in South Florida, like that sort of thing. And just to try to make friends. so ⁓ you can make a village. You can make, and it’s not something where you’re like.

Brandi Lewis (37:03)
Yeah.

Yeah.

Laura (37:23)
making friends just so they can take care of your kids like no but you know it’s one of those things you can there’s there’s always options and that’s what my ex-mother-in-law did and it worked really well for her and it was so ⁓ it’s so nice that she’s still in contact with those people who were her village so

Brandi Lewis (37:41)
Yeah, that’s so awesome to hear. I feel like when you go through something like that too, you really get really close with those people and that bond I don’t think ever severs. ⁓ cause they really understand what you went through. Yeah. I love hearing that.

Laura (37:50)
Exactly.

Yeah.

Brandi Lewis (37:55)
so after hearing about, you know, so many other women that you knew that had gone through divorce just like you, did it make you feel less alone?

Laura (38:06)
Yes, and then it also makes me feel sad for society because it’s like how many people go through this. So I’m not gonna lie, I’m very jaded at the moment and although

Brandi Lewis (38:10)
Yeah. Yeah.

Of

course, yeah, I would be too.

Laura (38:20)
I don’t see myself ever getting married again. ⁓ And I know it hasn’t been that long that I’ve been separated, but I’ve met quite a few interesting characters in dating. ⁓ One of which, a few months ago before things ended pretty badly, but anyway, I saw a future with them. But it was somebody who wanted to get married. And it’s one of those things where-

Brandi Lewis (38:23)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Laura (38:49)
First of all, my divorce isn’t even finalized yet and I’m always very upfront about that with anyone I’m dating, of course. But it’s like one of those things that like, I don’t think I could get married again. And that might be a deal breaker for some people. ⁓ I don’t think, it’s become this like, I don’t need a piece of paper to tell me that I love somebody, that I’m committed. ⁓ And I think that it just makes things very complicated should you want to leave.

Brandi Lewis (39:00)
Thank you.

Yeah.

Laura (39:17)
or should things end badly and divorce is very expensive at one point this year I was spending a thousand dollars a week on employers a week so literally literally and so it was it’s it’s so expensive it’s such an expensive process and especially if you have kids and I do want more kids and I’m young enough that I have some time but

Brandi Lewis (39:26)
wow.

That’s like daycare. Yeah. ⁓

Mm-hmm.

Laura (39:46)
I still like, you know…

It’s really hard because I think that some people do want marriage, but I don’t think that a paper needs to define you. And so I feel a little jaded when it comes to things like that. I do think that…

My outlook might not be some like it might be an unpopular opinion is what I’m trying to say Although I know people agree with me, but it’s just yeah, I just feel like marriage isn’t the end-all be-all and I don’t think that it’s I could change my mind. I’m never I never say never of course, but

Brandi Lewis (40:13)
Yeah.

Yeah.

time also, time will help also if you figuring that out. But I mean, if I was in your shoes, I would be just as jaded. Yeah. I mean, that’s very understandable from where you’ve been and you know what the process is now of going through divorce and doing that with a kid. So yeah, I mean, that’s very understandable to be in your shoes and feel that way. I don’t think that’s bad. You have talked a lot about like dating now and kind of trying to move forward in life with, which I think is awesome. And I think it’s awesome for a lot of

people to hear that also, that there is a life after divorce. There is a life after everything you’ve gone through. ⁓ How are you navigating that now? I know it’s still fresh and new. I have been in the dating world, so I laugh when you say stuff, because I understand exactly where you’re coming from. Dating is very different, but it sounds, I think it’s really good to hear that you are still trying to move forward in life. ⁓ So where are you right now?

Laura (41:27)
⁓ Okay, so I do first of all want to say that just because you’re not fully divorced doesn’t mean you don’t deserve to have a life. ⁓ And so I did get on the apps quite soon for what people thought. ⁓ And I didn’t really care about the judgment. My mom, I thought my mom would judge me. My mom is a little bit old school. She’s older, unless she’s my very best friend. She really is. She’s a little older.

Brandi Lewis (41:38)
Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Laura (41:54)
And so she’s kind of like, she has this old school mentality, even though she moved in with my dad, my dad had my two brothers. She moved in with my dad before they got married. It was a whole like taboo thing. My grandmother was like clutching her pearls. was like a whole thing. And so like she did that. So she’s not completely old school and traditional. And so she’s really happy for me that I like got on the apps and I was like so excited. I got on the apps like in January, which is like two months after like, you know, things like we separated a month after we got here to Miami.

Brandi Lewis (42:05)
Yeah, losing it. Yeah.

Yeah.

Laura (42:24)
And so I that is quite soon and obviously do it when you feel ready and a lot of people I’m in therapy. I’ve definitely recommend therapy by the way for somebody for everybody truthfully, I think everybody needs therapy, but that’s a different story. ⁓ But if you’re going through this definitely therapy my therapist always says like you deserve to have a life and so ⁓

Brandi Lewis (42:44)
you

Laura (42:46)
people might think that I’m not ready to date like you haven’t fully processed your divorce you’re not over him and here’s the thing I think I was over like long before things actually ended I was over it and so it’s different from person to person only start dating when you feel ready I felt ready in January and I was like you know what let’s do this and I have had the time of my life I have had people that I’ve gone on date like one date with I’ve had people that I’ve gone on two dates with I had a guy who I really liked who decided to move to San Francisco and not even tell me like what the hell was that

Brandi Lewis (43:15)
Yeah,

Laura (43:15)
I was like, alright. And so I have

Brandi Lewis (43:16)
you get all the dating stories. Yeah.

Laura (43:20)
met some really great people, like very interesting people and it’s been like so amazing. ⁓ And then I met someone I really, really, really liked and I didn’t expect it. went to through, like I went in with the mentality of I want to date for fun. I want to have fun and meet new people, not anything serious.

So I was always very transparent about that. And of course I got a ton of people who were like, of course you’re, you want to have fun. And so I had to weed out some really horrible people. And so when I met this guy, was kind of like, Whoa, I wasn’t expecting to like him more, like as much as I did.

Brandi Lewis (43:49)
Yeah. ⁓

Laura (44:03)
He felt the same way. He also got out of a really long relationship. It wasn’t a marriage, but it was a relationship and it was they were living together and it was like a whole thing. And so very similar stories. Didn’t have kids though. and then, you know, we dated exclusively. We, we had that talk and it was like three months. We had a weekend away plans and then I ghosted him. mean, he ghosted me. He ghosted me. Did not hear from him. I s***.

Brandi Lewis (44:26)
Aww.

Now

⁓

Laura (44:32)
Like

we had a weekend planned and he did not show up. And so I haven’t heard from him since and that’s what happened. So that’s, don’t know. Somehow the trauma from that was worse than my divorce. Yeah, it was like, it was like, are you serious? I finally like somebody again. so there’s that.

Brandi Lewis (44:39)
No.

Yeah, it opened everything back up, I would imagine. Yeah, the trust.

Yeah.

Laura (45:02)
And so since then, it’s been like really fun dates here and there until another very nice guy. that’s currently what’s happening right now. Another really, really nice guy that I’ve been seeing exclusively. And so we’ll see where it goes. I’m still like not putting pressure on anything. I’m very upfront, open about like my divorce is not final. I have a kid. I live with my mom and grandma. I come with a lot of crap. Like I come with a lot. They know that and ⁓

Brandi Lewis (45:12)
Yeah.

Yeah.

Laura (45:32)
You know, it’s been fun, so.

Brandi Lewis (45:34)
I think that’s amazing. Like you are even in the dating world, having somebody that you planned a week with and you know, that opens up the trust and the feelings all over again. I get it. ⁓ I think that would have hurt me a lot as well. But to see you continuing even past that is, I think that’s really commendable for sure.

Laura (45:56)
Yeah, my thing is, and it’s not that I don’t want to be alone. It’s never that. It’s like, I just want to have fun. And so I’ve learned so much even since that experience that now I just stay fully detached from anyone. When I first started seeing the guy that I’m currently seeing, which was early September. So it’s still early. It’s very early, like very early. Don’t get me wrong. ⁓ It was kind of like he was a little inconsistent.

Brandi Lewis (46:04)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Laura (46:23)
And I kind of taught him a lesson in that I’m not waiting around for anybody anymore. You don’t make plans with me. I’ve got plans with somebody else. I’ve got plans with somebody else. I have options and that’s not be, you know, like being mean That’s just me. Like I want to live my life and I’m not like, I’m not putting my life on pause for someone who may or may not show up. So it was quote unquote teaching him a lesson and he got that lesson and he like,

Brandi Lewis (46:27)
Yeah,

Yeah.

Laura (46:48)
Like

now we’ve been seeing each other so much more regularly and so he doesn’t even give me a chance to have anyone else around. And so there’s that. You know, it’s, I definitely love the feeling of being detached and not in the sense of, you know, being cold, but just unbothered. I am living my life regardless of whether something works out or not.

Brandi Lewis (47:12)
Good for you. Good for you. That is such a good lesson. I think so many times as women, it’s so easy for us to want to be attached to a man every second or, you know, cause that’s, I mean, we’re around the same age millennial. So, you know, we grew up seeing the happy endings and the Disney stories and you end up and fall in love and.

when you grow up, you see that that is not easy. It’s totally different from what the movies portray. So I think that is awesome for you to get back out there again. I think it’s really cool. two more questions. One I think is really important is about therapy. You talk, you spoke on therapy and getting a therapist. How important was, was that for you to go and, and seek out a therapist for help?

Laura (47:36)
Okay.

So I’ve actually been in therapy for quite a long time even before I had therapists growing up too because I just had like kind of like a crazy childhood and it’s something that I think truly everyone needs on some level you just need to find a therapist that works for you that you vibe with

Brandi Lewis (48:05)
Mm-hmm.

Okay.

Laura (48:16)
But I will say ⁓ that having a therapist through this has helped me a lot.

think everyone, regardless of what you’re going through, everyone needs therapy on some level. It just depends on how often just to process what you’re kind of going through in your daily life. Everyone has chaos. Everyone has it. And so truly therapy has helped me so much just sort of validate my feelings, ⁓ compartmentalize and figure out like

Brandi Lewis (48:35)
Yep.

Laura (48:45)
how to navigate things. had therapy earlier today actually and she helped me make a business decision. I just think that therapy is just so essential especially when you’re going through something so life-changing like divorce. They really help you process your feelings so definitely super important.

Brandi Lewis (48:52)
Love you.

Yeah.

like that.

Awesome. Yeah, I think that’s really important. I believe in therapy and think everybody should have it. Like you said, we all have life messes and craziness that goes on. So it helps a lot. And the last question I always love to end with is just giving some type of advice to anybody listening to this that has now fully heard your story. And ⁓ I commend you because I just, think you’re

probably in a much better place than you think you are, but I think you’re in an amazing spot to have gone through what you’ve gone through. But what message would you give somebody that is walking in your shoes, that is maybe going through divorce now and just doesn’t know where to turn to? Or the business also of finding your own niche and really honing into that. Like what piece of advice would you give somebody to end with?

Laura (49:59)
I would say take it day by day, start slow. Don’t try to rush into a lot of things. There was a lot like when I was first going through this, ⁓ realizing, my God, my life is changing. try not to rush a business is not going to grow overnight, but to put in systems in place that will get you to some sort of automated.

sort of business so that you have something to rely on, something very reliable in the future. If you are going through what I went through and you don’t have your own income, start slowly. Start figuring out. ⁓ Truthfully, when things kind of started getting weird, it was like a few years ago that this kind of happened. It wasn’t on that same scale.

But the business wasn’t where I wanted it to be. I started stashing money away from his paycheck. And that’s something that I’ve seen other people do. ⁓ But truthfully, just try to make your own income in any way. So if you ever feel stuck in a marriage, just know that there are ways out and there are people that will help you get there. ⁓ You just got to find them and you got to find what business model works for you because what works for me may not work for you.

Brandi Lewis (50:51)
Yeah.

Laura (51:16)
That sort of thing. it’s just really, really building up those systems and creating a business that you love that gives you that time freedom, that flexibility, and also that steady income that a lot of people don’t have when they’re going through things like this. And it’s just so it’s so hard. And so just take it day by day, though. That’s my biggest thing. Start slow. Don’t think that you have to do like reinvent the wheel. Don’t think you have to do everything at once. And ⁓ like it’s don’t stress out.

Brandi Lewis (51:40)
Thank you.

Laura (51:47)
what’s meant to be will be it’ll work out.

Brandi Lewis (51:49)
Yeah, that’s great advice. Thank you so much, Laura. And I just want to bless you and tell you you’re doing such an amazing job. I definitely think you are, especially with the child. And it’s just so many blessings from your story. And I can truly hear them and see them. So I think that’s awesome. Thank you again for doing this with me.

Laura (52:06)
Thank you so much for having me. It was so much fun.

Brandi Lewis (52:09)
Absolutely. And then also in the, in the show notes, I do want to put a link to your marketing agency so people can find where to find you if they’re interested also in just getting more advice from you also. think that’d be great. So thank you again.

Laura (52:21)
Awesome.

Thank you.